Who I am As A Therapist
“When we begin to speak, we speak on two levels, on the level of what we intend
to say and hope others will understand…and on the level of saying things that
we don’t intend and can’t hear ourselves saying. Therefore, part of language is
always unconscious and what is unconscious insists or repeats.”
— The Unsayable, by Annie G. Rogers, Ph.D.
As a therapist whose roots are grounded in the psychoanalytic tradition, I am very interested in unconscious process and in repetitions. Most people come to see me because they find themselves unwittingly repeating patterns that do not serve them, patterns that cause them great distress and jeopardize their relationships, their careers, and ultimately, their well being. These repetitions may manifest in recurrent bodily symptoms and complaints, such as chronic headaches or stomach pain; in compulsive behavior patterns, such as eating disorders, drug addiction, and sexual compulsivity; in self destructive behaviors such as cutting and sexual acting out; or in recurrent relationship patterns, such as picking men and women who are unavailable, abusive, or overly dependent and enmeshed.
It is my belief that these patterns are the way the psyche conveys childhood traumas or wounds, that they are the psyches attempt to speak of damage that was done that was never fully understood or digested and that has not been fully brought into the light of day — of one’s conscious mind — where it can be healed.
The way that I work as a therapist is to listen to and watch for the language of my patient’s unconscious as it manifests in their lives, in their relationships, in their dreams, and in the therapeutic relationship. Through these observations, I am able to decipher and translate to them in an impactful way that which has remained hidden and illusive. In so doing I help them to decode and make sense of the unspeakable wounds that they have suffered.
In bringing language and meaning to these painful experiences and in making space for feelings and insights to emerge, the damaging repetitions are dismantled and stripped of their potency. They no longer hold so much sway over my patients’ lives and relationships because they have become more fully metabolized and have been brought more fully into awareness. The burdens and secrets that so bound their bodies and their psyches are dislodged and they are freed up to be in the world in a more fully embodied and authentic way and to experiment with new ways of thinking and acting and being in their lives and in their relationships.